Why hello their awesome alliteration achievers! What great alliteration you came up with. This weeks focus is Onomatopeia's. An onomatopeia is the sound effect of poetry. It is when the word is the name of the sound. Check out this onomatopeia poem below. Then using De Bono's yellow and black hat to comment on what you thought was really good and maybe not so good about the poem?
Laundrette
Wishy, washy there's my shirt
Swirling squirming round my vest.
Splashy, dashy, two red socks
In a sandwich with the rest.
A football scaf, a bright-red hat
A pillow-slip, blue jeans, a sheet.
Oh, my goodness, what is what?
A hand, a face, a pair of feet
Someone swirling round quite bare-
How did Granny get in there?
Gareth Owen
I think the poem has good onomatapeia words and it describes the washing machine swishing round and round.The bad things about it was it had the same onomatopeia words.It makes me feel i'm in a wirl pool spinning.
ReplyDeleteFrom Josephine
I think the Onomatopeia is good it discribes the sound it's making. Its also good because it sounds real.
ReplyDeleteIt could use a little bit more onomatopeia.
I really think it it was good but next time use a bit more onomatopeia.
By India
It has some really great bits of onomatopei but it could use a bit more.It also has some good rhyming words that fit into the sentence well. It describes each item carefully so you can paint a picture in your mind. its a good laugh when grannys in the washing machine. I think there could be a bit more onomatopei. apart from that it was a good onomatopei poem.
ReplyDeleteBeth
Alot of onomatopeia's.
ReplyDeleteAot to long and not to short.
It's not boring cause it's like those poems that make you kind of laugh cause why would a granny go in a washing machine
maybe it's got tomuch onomatopeia's.
I kind of wanted similes.
BY MAX HILL
I think it hooked me in.It has a few rhyms in it to what I thought.Its got adjectives alot descbing the clothes in the washing maching.
ReplyDeleteby sam
i think that it has lots of onamatapayers and lots of discrtive words in it.As soon as i se the poem and read it i want to read it over and over again like i can,t stop.
ReplyDeleteBY JOHN ROSS
i think it was a very good poem but it could use a bit more onamatopeia. it describes the washing machine and clothes very well. i thought it was pretty funny when it said that granny was inside the machine!it also hooked me in with all of the amazing adgectivesit had.
ReplyDeleteBrie downey
i loved the poem it was funny, interesting and had lots of onomatopei in it but it didn't make complete sense to me and it could be a bit more interesting
ReplyDeletedaniel
i really enjoyed the rhyme and onomatepea. it painteda mind ppicture in my head. it wasfunny top read anndinteresting.i understood it eaisly.
ReplyDeleteby amy smith
6.8.09
at the start it remindes me of the story caled mr wishy washy when mr wishy washys doing the dishes.And the sound of water makes me think of the pools.the end reminds me of the story calld hansel and gretal going into the witches old house how gretal shoves the witch into the oven
ReplyDeleteThe poem had to much onomatopeia and nedded to be more simles
ReplyDeleteby Callum